Relief Not Regret: Saying Goodbye to the Baby Things

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I've slowly been purging all the baby things as the Little Guy outgrows them. He's child number three and child number last. When he was able to sit on his own and didn't need the Bumbo anymore, I gave it away. When my friend was pregnant and going to need a baby swing, we passed it right on. The Little Guy was getting too big for it anyway (and I mean he was probably a year over the age limit on it, but it seriously put him to sleep in no time. My friend was going to need that magic).

As soon as he started protesting the high chair at the table and wanted to sit like one of his older sisters (albeit he was on his knees and balanced precariously with none too few falls), we passed it on to the newest cousin. The moment he outgrew any clothes or hats or shoes or clothing item, off it went to the donation station.

It felt good to get rid of things that we didn't need anymore. They had been through three kids and were well-used. After each child outgrew an item or a toy or a something, we would usually pack it away until the next child came along and could use it.

But not this time.

This time we are done, and done for good. No more holding onto baby things to save for the next little bundle. No more swings to store in the garage with the hopes of rocking another baby to sleep. No more bassinet that was only ever used as a changing table anyway. No more high chairs, no more bottles, no more tiny baby onesies (except the ones I'm saving to someday turn into a teddy bear. Have you seen those? They look so cute!).

We recently sold the baby crib, one of the last baby items we've had in the house. It had been one of our first major decisions as pre-parents: deciding what decor we wanted in our baby's room that would welcome our first infant with a safe and loving environment. We chose a cherry wood finish convertible crib. It would start as a crib, then convert to the toddler bed with a side rail, and finally to a full-size bed. We thought we were planning ahead, acquiring something that would grow with our child. Unfortunately, we didn't foresee that the size of the bed and the size of the room that we would put it in were not quite compatible. Thus, the crib was only ever transformed into a toddler bed and never made it to full-size. Instead, we listed it for sale and it was gone within the week.

I thought I might feel some regret over getting rid of that first parenting purchase we made, but I really don't. I am relieved to have it gone, to not feel it holding space for another child. It was a huge part of the past eight years, and I will have many memories of babies laying in there (although they hardly ever slept in it), or screaming at me while gripping the side rail, or jumping up and down in furious defiance of sleep while wailing "MAMA" at the top of their lungs at two o'clock in the morning. Yep, I am perfectly fine saying goodbye to that.

I look at infants now and only feel appreciation for the tiny human just entering the world. I don't experience the desire to have my own newborn that I had experienced in the past upon glimpsing a peacefully sleeping infant. I am happy to hold someone else's baby, but really, I don't want that experience for myself again. I am relieved that I don't have to try new tricks and ideas to calm a colicky baby, or worry that he or she is gaining enough weight, or experience another diaper blowout in the middle of the grocery store, or get woken up multiple times throughout the night to try to figure out why the baby is crying this time.

Will I miss the tiny baby snuggles and newborn sounds? Absolutely. But they are precious memories that I can look back on, and instead, right now, I can hug my growing children and hold intelligent conversations with them (although truth be told we talk a lot about poop).

I am enjoying the phase of life I am in, the phase where my children are growing and learning and questioning and exploring and giving me glimpses into what they will be like as adults. I look forward to the years to come with excitement and wonder, relieved the baby years, and things, are in the past.